Cameron brought his baby boy, Jaylen, to the pediatrician for his very first checkup. Jaylen was wrapped in a soft blue blanket with a pacifier in his mouth, looking completely uninterested in everything except sleeping and possibly his next snack.
The pediatrician, a cheerful man wearing glasses that seemed slightly too big for his face, gently examined Jaylen. He checked his heartbeat, reflexes, and performed that special doctor trick of making a baby cry in about three seconds.
Finally, he smiled and said, “You have a cute baby.”
Cameron beamed. “I bet you say that to all the parents.”
The doctor laughed. “No, just the ones who have cute babies.”
Cameron puffed up proudly. “Well, Jaylen gets it from his dad.”
The doctor raised an eyebrow, clearly doubtful but too polite to argue.
Cameron continued, “You should’ve seen me at his age. I looked like a Gerber baby who moonlighted as a shampoo model.”
The doctor chuckled. “Well, he definitely has strong features.”
Cameron winked. “And a strong future. I already made him an Instagram account. He has five followers—three of them are my mom using different accounts.”
Just then, Jaylen let out a huge sneeze that startled even him. His pacifier flew out and landed right on the doctor’s clipboard.
Cameron quickly grabbed it like he was recovering a fumbled football. He wiped it on his shirt and popped it back into Jaylen’s mouth like a professional.
The doctor nodded approvingly. “You’re adapting well to fatherhood.”
Cameron smiled. “Oh, yeah. I’ve mastered diapers, bottles, and doing laundry without shrinking anything. I even learned how to swaddle him without watching a YouTube tutorial.”
He paused.
“Okay, maybe I watched three.”
As the checkup ended, the doctor stood and smiled.
“Keep doing what you’re doing. He’s healthy, happy, and clearly has a great sense of comedic timing.”
Right at that moment, Jaylen created a dramatic diaper situation that announced itself like a trumpet solo.
Cameron froze.
The doctor coughed politely. “And he has a very… expressive digestive system.”
Cameron sighed.
“Yep. Gets that from his mom.”