Five top surgeons from different cities were having lunch together at a medical conference when the conversation turned to an important question: Who makes the best patient?
New York Surgeon:
“I like operating on accountants. When you open them up, everything is numbered. It’s like looking at a perfectly organized spreadsheet.”
Los Angeles Surgeon:
“Give me electricians any day. Their insides are practically color-coded, and if something isn’t working, it’s usually just a blown fuse or a short circuit.”
Chicago Surgeon:
“You guys have it easy. I prefer librarians. Everything is in alphabetical order, they never interrupt, and they always come back for follow-ups—with a bookmark.”
Dallas Surgeon:
“Please. I go for lawyers. They’re heartless, gutless, spineless, and their heads and rear ends are practically interchangeable. Surgery becomes a breeze—just swap the parts and send them the bill.”
The fifth surgeon, from Silicon Valley, had been quietly stirring his green matcha latte. The others looked at him.
He smiled and said, “You’re all missing the goldmine. The best patients? Politicians.”
Everyone raised an eyebrow.
He continued, “They have no functioning brain, no spine, no guts, and their organs are all tax-deductible. Plus, every time you operate, there’s a new donor on standby. And if you mess up?”
He paused for dramatic effect.
“…nobody notices the difference.”
The table erupted in laughter—except for the man in the corner wearing a “Vote for Honesty” badge. He quietly moved his salad aside and asked for the check.